i had a nice dream. in which a scenario which i hope will happen. but i know it's never gonna happen. NEVER! it's so not gonna happen. i'm sad. nah, sad's not the word. i yearn for ur coming back. but never is it gonna happen.

anguish overwhelmed mi. overcomed mi. overtook mi. u failed. but i failed terribly.

i was so prepared to go out until the rain came.

i hate you!

the bursary's here. guess i'd have to take it alone this year. no more moms, no more dads.

last year this day. i was wif him n gang. at esplanade, den to semb near raymond's house. they left after drinkin. we went 588. it was boring. but i got a choc from his fren. i'm relieved i didnt take any photos wif him. lucky. blahs.

i'm paranoid i guess. such stupid things i do. such childish things. tryin to mske him notice care for mi. but yea, it's dumb. everytime things, plans screw up at the very last moment. maybe we werent meant to be. i wasnt lydat in the past i hope. but well, ppl change. so damn lot things happen this year. too much to handle. simply too much.

i hear ppl's toking downstairs. screw these ppl. cant u juz tok softly.

i wanna sleep. can i juz sleep forever? duhs.

it's dumb. wadeva i'm doing now is dumb. i mean who would be so free to interfere with other ppl's life? i'm gonna change my blog add again. soon.

every song i put represents every phase of my life. n ya, i noe tat's how u feel(verse 1). but i wun change. so wun u. maybe we aint compatible right from the start. so please dun apologise to mi for a wrong u didnt do. coz i'm simply the one to be blamed. not u. i dunno where i stand in ur life. but guess i'm juz someone unimportant. so i've simply no right to give u any cold shoulder, vent my anger on u. i'm in a dilemma. but i juz cant care anymore. i cant take it anymore. i juz cant. so juz let go. there's so many better girls out there. maybe u'll find someone better. u will find someone better. u will. maybe someone who stays near u. someone who aint so childish. someone who aint so unreasonable. someone who aint so demandin n mean.

happy 2006. but i'm not happy.

niahahaks. changed my blog skin again. comments anyone?? hahas. i'm bored lahs. i dunno how to do the java project. especially at home. think i've gotta do it in sch coz home, with those 4 monsters, is my onli distraction. n i've to buy 20 oranges again. *yawns.

wanna cut my hair soon. SOON. haiz, i've actualli no idea wad i should do to my hair. cut? curl? straighten? ahhhh. wadeva.

i miss my darling. =(

nvm. i'll get to see him HOURS later. wahahaha.

i'm losing it. boo~

aites, time to go. time for my bunnies. think sis aint coming home tonight again. bwah! good thing, the com is mine tonite. muahahahas.

oh ya, someone said i was happening. LOLs. =D

lalala. went party world today. saw my darling. so slack n fat seh. muahahas. was damn bloated coz i had THREE DRINKS! lolx. i finished the tidbits. hahas. omg. am gettin fat. wahaha. sing, sang, sung. den went to the arcade after they ate coz there's too many ppl at k pool. played the 'air hockey'. hahas. fun. won three times wif ky. yeah~! hahas. den played pool after tat. i won twice coz my 'opponents' had their black ball going into the wrong hole or the white ball simply went in with the black ball. niahahaks. we still won. tsk tsk.

i had a dream. it's nice. but as usual, anything/everything nice had an end. boo~

few more days before the countdown. bf, please wake up early on tat day. hahas.

watched king kong. super sad seh. *sobs. but kinda sweet. everything seems so simple n nice when u're naive. somehow. blah blah blahs.

- such beautiful dream yet ugly reality -

i wanna go Andana Spa. i'm so tempted. but it's 148bucks for whole day with free flow of food!!! i wan a sponsor!!! please? hahas. maybe i shall juz pamper myself for once if i get enough pay. =D

aites, i wan to go out. balcony seems nice. they've gt a jacuzzi rite smack in the centre of the 2nd level. so cool lor. but imagine urself in it wif ppl u dunno surroundin u. it'll be weird. hahas.

i so so so so so need my sleep.

arghhhhh. i juz cant seem to upload tat song. BOO~

anyway 2nd sucky thing. cant find the song i wan.

3rd sucky thing. my sis STAINED(with pen ink) my NIKE BAG. suck la.

i need a drink. blehs.

i wanna go ralcony. tsk tsk.

niahahaks. went to the pool wif xf. but as usual. wrong day wrong timing. least we wun drenched in the rain. LOL. saw this couple trying to sun tan in the pool. rofl. so dumb seh. den lie in the path way as if they're very slim. something tells mi tat they're from jc. blehs.

aites, plans for the whole week:

wed: out wif my darling maybe, or sentosa wif xf
thurs: out wif my GANG -wahahas- to k box or partyworld n play pool =D *i need money. any sponsors? wahahas.
fri: no plans yet (please tell mi wad to do!)
sat: count down hopefully.

watched superfunkies. the aqua park or sth at east coast seems fun. ppl, let go n play. pls? it's till 10th jan. n dammit. i think no one's free to play wif mi. =( sadded. blehs.

i need to go shopping. seriously.

anyway my hand wrist hurts. i dunno y. having a headache. damn. nah, i dun feel well. feels wierd these days. something's wrong. something muz be wrong. with mi. everything's turning upside down.





- i want you here tonight
- and i need you by my side
- for just one more moment
- juz, one more moment

utterly disappointed.

haha. someone got shocked by my song. WAHAHAHAS. shant mention his name if not i'll get killed right on the spot next time. hahas.

today is boxing day.

anyway as usual flip gt bully by boxer as i've mentioned. but clever thing is he jump back to his cage willingly on his own. *applaud* hahas.

mochi n boxer went on an excursion on their own when i left the door open. had a hard time catchin mochi but boxer came back on his own when i gave up on him. lol.

i love chattin.

oh ya did i say? my stomach had been feelin damn weird after 23. duno wth i ate wrong. boo~

mochi = mu ji = 母鸡

hahas. mochi realli look like a hen sometimes. hahas.

I LOVE FLIP!!! i think flip love to be covered by the pillow. hahas. SO SUPER DUPER CUTE!!!!!! OMG! hehe. but he gt chased by boxer again. damn boxer. so naughty. I STILL LOVE FLIP. omg i'm so in love wif him. lol. muahahaha.

suddenly i tot, those who seems to be poor are filthy rich. those who seems rich are poor. lolx.

anyway it's xmas today. didnt bother to go out today coz some fat ass WOKE UP LATE. was damn fed up so stayed at home. spoil my mood onli. so slept. watched princess diary. so nice seh. chatted wif a couple of ppl n my so-called scandal. who some fuckin bastard(my ex) thinks tat i've something on wif him. hahs. wadeva. dun i hav the right to mix with anyone i like? onli one word for tat bastard/jerk/wadeva : ASSHOLE. hahs.

time for sweet home alabama. so farewell.

anyway, i think sis's room is gonna be horribly rip apart by those little monsters. hahas.

anyway yest, celebration(steamboat) at jm's house. feeling damn sleepy. i won a few rounds of daidee!!! wahahaha. left at ten plus after eatin the log cake. quarrelled wif him but everything's alrite. hahas. bought vodka. originally tat pig wanted to go town to watch king kong. but too bad i didnt bring my ez link. hahas. haha. stayed at mac till one plus. finished the bottles of vodka in case my dad finds out. vodka, not realli nice but still adaptable. someone called mi while i was headin home n during the quarrel. being attitude, i said hi n walked off. i suspected it was jolin. didnt manage to look properly. so apologies here. sorry!! saw bryan wif his stead. hahas.

anyway he stayed over coz there's simply no way he could go home without any transport. bathed, fed those monsters before i went to bed. it's nice to hav someone to sleep beside wif at times. but i swear i'll kick him off the bed if ever, HE, OCCUPIES 3/4 OF THE BED again. FAT ASS. blehs.

anyway, it's nice to have a good to bully bf. muahahaha. oei bf, u still owe mi sth. PLEASE REMEMBER TO WRITE IT FOR MI. hahas.

anyway, fat fat is forever eating. n did i say dad ask sis to give away her bunnies? *sobs. sadded. still findin some animal lover to help keep them.

anyway did any one really i was using anyways for every start of the paragraph? hahas.

anyway i so god-damn tired coz i onli slept at bout 3 plus or 4 last nite? n coz of some fat ass occupying more than enough space i almost fell of my bed. my bed aint huge okie? hahas. aites, love my darling. tsk tsk. *muacks. n i swear(again) tat i'll bite u if u bully mi again. blehs. keke.

anyway i need to sleep. i'm LACKING OF SLEEP. so well good nite n merry xmas to all n happy new year to all. hahas.

blah blah blahs. i'm dying my hair soon. woohoo~ =))

fuck u ppl. fuck u.




i still love my darling more.

it's been long since i've blogged. too many things had happened. 2 days back was mom's bday. happy belated birthday mom. luv ya.





i love my darling~ =)




i'm proud of u.





i miss u.





*muacks. =D

u onli notice n care for ppl of the opposite sex n not ppl of the same sex to seek attention from them.

THE UNDENIABLE TRUTH.

y is it such tat one take others for granted? shallow. real shallow. if u dunno bout anything bout mi, concerning mi, my thoughts, my life, my wadeva, den PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP! coz its so fucking fake to pretend tat u noe mi inside out. n oso, fake tat u care coz in deep truth is u dun. u onli care bout URSELF. wtf. wad's the fuckin point of being nice/treating others nice when u're taken for granted. they dun even bother bout u. even if u're dead or alive. coz they simply cant be bothered. they cant be bothered. they're busy enjoyin themselves onli. they can onli be bothered bout themselves. nv botherin to ask. tat's how self centered some ppl are. the world revolves onli around them. THEM onli.

such lousy frenz i've gt.

shallow. very shallow. look beyond the horizon.

cant u all juz be abit more SENSITIVE?

mochi almost 'escape' yest. she went on an excursion to the living room. lol.



so broke, so broken, so broken off, so broken down.

i've lotsa problems now. includin migraine n insomnia, i'm so dead. i need PILLS. lol. n worst, it's hard to CATCH BERRY back to the cage! TAT BITCH. haks. but now she's taggin mochi almost everywhere she go. playing together. n mochi's protectin her. so sweet. if onli.... aites, shall try forget bout those unhappy stuffs. i've dumb bunnies for example boxer trying to rape flip. OMG! hahas. sis's still not coming home i think. blah blah blahs. i've no one to complain to. =(


mochi MOLESTED MI! OMGGGGGGGGGG~ lucky she's a female. if not i'll smack n bbq it. LOL. ahahas.

boo~ my body's aching. muz be coz of the crazily playing of badminton. n oso mayb i cant slp well becoz of some fat ass. hahas. anyway hope we all join the captain's ball thingy ar. like so fun. hahas. watched bleach. so nice!! bwahahahaha.

mon's gonna suck. haben do chen mei mei's compo. OMG! blahs. i'm so tired. a headache's strikin me.

i so so so wanna go out n hav fun. i wanna go shopping, go pool, or kbox or sth. i'm bored. hahas.

oh ya, juz wanna say i love those stupid acts of my bunnies. boxer stood up, tilt behind, lean on flip n flip moved away n BAH! boxer fell. wahahas. it's so sweet to see mochi n berry playing together. even berry became cleverer. she knows how to jump n enjoy life on sis's bed. hahas.

she's so irritating at times. boo~! tsk tsk. stop trying to piss mi off when i'm already not in the mood.

anyway forgot to say. stop looking at mi one kind lor. i noe u all can dress up well. so wad? u all changed doesnt mean i WILL CHANGE WIF U ALL. big deal if u've got lotsa of clothes. u've got ur bf TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING. n i go to sch to study, not conduct a fashion show. so u dun hav to look from top to bottom to check mi out. say it rite in my face lah. u dun hav to stare. NYP, SBM BUSINESS MANAGEMENT COURSE BIG DEAL AR? such a bitch. stop being such an ass. u're worst than tat.

feels so wrong. everything feels so wrong. even the weather temperature. feeling damn cold. i dunno y. a headache hit mi on the train. but least it's GONE now. hahs. sch's boring. no interest in studyin. i wanna get a job. it's my first priority. went around today. got him something which i promise. i mean i promised to get him something. anyway after everything, went to tanjong pagar for interview. den went to tampines see lao gong rebond hair. make mi so tempted. think i wanna rebond soon. when i've gt the money which is nv possible. haks.

MY HP LAG! JUZ RECEIVED A MSG WHICH WAS SENT ON 19NOV! GOODNESS.

u giv mi all those attitude face n wan mi to say wad' wrong wif mi, wad more can i say? of coz the best is keep my mouth shut. n the least u could do is giv mi a hug b4 u left. but.. ya.

-----------------------------
sometimes i'm juz so envious of her. she doesnt hav to think nor worry no more. least she was taken over by death n not a lover's heartbreak. least she knew he loved her dearly even till she was gone. so dearly.

-----------------------------

something's wrong. but i juz cant figure out wad it is.

-----------------------------
it's over. i need wan a hug.

tears dropped. fuck.

FUCK YOU! I RATHER FALL FOR A GIRL. N I SIMPLY CANT BE BOTHERED ANYMORE.

i'm gonna make a blog to bitch coz my bf aint there for mi to bitch. so well. hahahs. feel so much better chattin wif brandon. least he's lame n funny. hahas. miss chattin wif him. it's 12plus in aussy now. he went to movie world. so cool lor. got tweety, bugs bunny, taz!!! n more lah. hahas. super cute lor taz. hahas.

some of my money is missin in my account. i've replaced the money i took out. hmm, gotta find how come.

duhs. kiwi's tryin to ACT CUTE AGAIN when he's not AT ALL. n bf, u should stop actin cute too. =P hahas.

i'm so tempted to dye my hair(deep current) but yet not. arghH! i need mama's help~!!! anyway, i wanna get a job(hopefully) n earn money n get tat 6111 or n92 phone. they simply caught my attention. hahas. bf, PLEASE BE RICH WHEN WE GO OUT NEXT TIME CAN? =x muahaha. i'm juz kiddin. blehs.

havin a damn headache now again. boo~

i need to tok. can i bash someone up? =D

tat brown male scratched me! damn. but luckily flip did not when i carry him. n somehow he managed to jump onto sis's bed again but this time without any rack or box to help him.

- how do u penetrate someone's thoughts? observe. =) -

i PLAYED WIF MOCHI!!! see, told u i've gt a way. hahas. =P

- born to love. running away aint the best solution. always remember tat. =) -

16/11 : went to causeway to celebrate kiwi's bday wif cs, jy, julian, ah neh, jm, sab, ah bu, mi n of coz kiwi. ate at pizza hut. bought a mango cake for him. hahas. den the guys went off to jurong to ice skate first while we search for his gift. got two shirts for him. den we went to jurong to find them. saw a guy in orange n white skating. tat's wad i call SHUAI. n he held on to a little gal n skate wif her. this is wad i call CUTE. (to my bf: u SHOULD BE JEALOUS. muahaha.) den went to play pool. watched them play n i did play awhile but coz i still suck at it, n cs bth the slowness of the game, he took over mi. hahahs. den jm left coz she gt bbq. cs left coz he going to zouk. hahas.

after all those games, we proceeded on to marina square. ah bu left coz she gt dinner at home or sth. walked around n den ate again at yuki yaki buffet. hahas. after all those normal cookin of food. we MADE OUR OWN ICE CREAM. haha. it's so damn cool lor. mixin all those diff favours together. lolx. we left onli when they annouced they're closed.

went to esplanade n took some photos. den went home feelin super tired. it's still freaky to go home alone coz u tend to notice things u dun realli notice when u're not alone. like the FAT LIZARDS on the wall of the station. (..") hahas.

18/11: went to south to eat. saw leon on the way. he aint tat 'wow' as i tot. he's tryin to keep a low profile i guess. he dun even dare to look us in the eye. anyway, went to town to buy sth for ah neh with the usual peeps except this time julian didnt follow. n jy followed ah neh buy gift for his fren first. hahas. (to bf: dun jealous again. i'll get sth for u soon. i hope. =P wahahas.) ate at ljs. saw some DAMN AP HWA CHONG INSTITUTE ASSES. we wun be so pissed if u dun say wad u had. u lookin for trouble if u can piss ah neh off lor. so wad if u're smart? but if u're not considerate, or hav some fucking attitude probs, there's no point being smart coz u simply piss ppl off. the guys tried to act big n jiang yi qi kind lor. wth. as if u realli are. if some ppl find fault or wanna beat u, think u'll be the first to run. HAHA. anyway they like scared kena beaten by us lor. hahas. the guys keep shiftin their places. wahhahas. the gals keep asking if we were gonna sit or can they take the place. hahas. wth.

anyway went home after tat. went to sis room to catch the stubborn brown bunny back in the cage. den when i was in my room, i was shocked to heard some noises in her room. so went to her room again. saw flip stampin. he(i supposed) tryin to rape mochi, his mom lor. den i carry mochi out thinkin it'll be fine. on my way back to my room. heard those noise again. opened the door. the noise stopped so i stand at the door. den saw heard the noise again n i figured out it WAS FLIP. i think one of the brown ones is male too. coz they two tried to gang bang the other one coz she(i supposed. i dunno who's boxer or who's berry.) tried to escape, biting the cage n givin out some noises. so i brought her out.

told sis. sis say the gal one is too young to get pregnant coz if she did so, she'll die. =( so flip's now blacklisted n separated from the rest. he the onli one being lock in the cage. hahs. serve u rite for tryin to rape ur sibling n mom. blehs. =P

bf came over to my house supposedly to buy food for mi but he ended up empty handed to my home. sis shocked him by asking 'who ask u come my house' i think. LOL.

i wanna catch a movie soon. bf, u saw it. so u better make time for mi. muahahas.

wk msg mi yest out of a sudden. so damn shocked. n well, after all those chattings, found out he finds ah bu attractive. hahas. haiyo, as long as u're a guy, most prob u'll notice her first coz she's attractive n furthermore, she knows how to dress up n is very slim. den after tat, will u notice the others coz u're simply blinded by her right from the start.

i wanna play wif mochi. but she dun wanna play wif mi. sadded. i'm gonna find a way to make her play wif mi! whahaas. =D

- she's the coa. no wonder everyone's fallin for her. -

got tempted by lao gong. i wanna watch juz like heaven!!! duhs.

blah blah blahs. had a hard time catchin all the FOUR bunnies back into their cage. flip was the easiest. muahahas. mochi is super cute. simply cute. slipping while eatin. LOL. flip's fallin asleep.

bwahs. shall go sleep now. i'm bored. n they dun wanna play wif mi. =( hahas.

time now. 1202. happy birthday KIWI!! hahahs.

a complete total mismatch.

aites, it weird y i'm still feelin this way coz i shouldnt be as i should have accepted tat fact long time ago. but actually i dun think i have. so much things reminds mi of her especially jay chou. n the fact tat no one actually knows y she did it sucks more.

look thru frenster. can say i kpo or sth. link till phylis' frenster. n in her pic, she put up bout 3 to 4 of hew's pic instead of hers. they took lotsa pics together i guess. but as for us, we onli took 3 from wad i noe. first on a 859 on the way to her house, second on the last day of sch n last on prom. all those things i did to her, i was so childish then. so easily influenced. even till now. n i started pushing her out of my life apart from all those fun we had. u cared even though i ignored u. yet i'm glad at least we were back as frenz before u left. at least i'd hav one less regret in this life.

i dunno why things will end up lydat. had i not be so childish in the first place, would things have changed? bwahs.

in fact, she was the first to realli gain my trust out of my circle of frens. she knew mi well though a short time too. i mean if i didnt trust her, i wun even dare to stay over at her house. least she dun say out wad i tell her. the first i stayed over at her house. the first i realli told to bout my mom. guess she took pity on mi too by treatin mi well. lettin mi stay over at her house, eat up her food, dye her hair, play badminton n bball, playin her guitar, using her com, treatin mi to swensens when she didnt hav to, tokin to her mom n dad, suppers, n lots more. she's so like my bf. hahs. but well, maybe all those who treats mi better is cause they noe bout wad happen to my mom. there aint realli such genuine ppl who treats u well because they wan to treat u well. they treat u well is maybe cause of sympathy, pitiness, companion etc. blahs.

overall, i'm juz sad to not be able to see her, tok to her, go her house, sleepovers, stories, bitchin, ur sarcasm, ur smile. i've let u down. n the guilt juz wouldnt go even if u're gone. so sorry. but the least u could do is at least tell us y before u left. i'm overwhelmed.

i'm amazed at the amount of time i spend doing nothing infront of the com n tv, in which the time should be spent on studyin. eh, well, at least it should be. hahs.

*yawns* i so feel like sleepin. weather's bad. it can be scorchin hot at one moment, n raining cats n dogs in another.

oh ya. didnt mention the other time. bought my bag. =) n saw sly on the way home. she's red. hahas. =P

anyways, sis bought this corn n some fast food look alike thingy for the bunnies to chew. for the corn, i think i noe how they'll chew. but as for the fast food thingy, i have COMPLETELY NO IDEA.

i so SO SOO SOO feel like going shoppin. or at least leave my house for a few days to some other places. i'm bored. i so wanna play wif the bunnies. but like wad sis say, they'll onli play wif themselves. blehs. n oso, from the place i'm sittin, i can simply see them lying around, lookin sleepy n bet they cant be bothered wif me. =(

n yay! saw fireworks yest. gosh. so beautiful. but too bad it's too far away.

blink 182. i'm gonna get their cd. hopefully soon. so many many cds i wanna get. jay, luo zhi xiang, mayday, nan quan mama, rainie... a hell lot. but well, blink 182 suits my mood nowadays. i need something noisy. hahas. =D

havin a damn headache. boo~ but least i'm contented tat it dun worsen. watched fruit basket. so CUTE!!! muahahs. cute cute cute. =D but it's kinda sad at certain parts.

everything i say below is of no link.

envy n jealousy are juz a line apart. u can be envious of a person because they have something u dun. but when it turns into jealousy, everything lose control.

hatred rips u of u. maybe i should initiate to make peace wif her AGAIN. tat cycle has been repeated umpteen times tat i dont know wad really to do. ahh. i dont know. i dont know wad to do actually. one could never be perfect. not even ur family. thus, when u're having an 'inperfect' family, the next u could actually lean on is ur frens. i mean they're the next u could trust. u cant possibly tok to a stranger on the streets n pour all ur inner thoughts to him/her rite? but when they've broken ur trust over n over again, r u supposed to forgive n forget, n giv them another chance?

it's actually weird to see someone u noe n not tok or at least greet the person. so wad if the cycle will repeat itself again. gradually u'll lose contact/quarrel n then suddenly u're not frens anymore. den, the betrayal cycle will repeat itself again. if i make peace wif her, wad will change? if i dun, wad wun?

aites, i dunno wth i'm toking above.

saw lihui yest. miss her damn lot. so feel like havin a tok wif her. least she noe mi quite throughly though in a very short period. least i get constructive advices. least i dun get so lost. least i noe who i am then. least she's the kind i wanna be. i'll remember wad she's told mi. but i noe i can never do it wif my kind of character. bwah,,

i'm feelin guilty for findin fault. findin fault wif my loved ones. n coz they seemed to be there whenever i need them. thus i vent my anger, my frustrations on them as i noe they wun leave mi. den, suddenly they disappear. soon, i'll become damn lost. wif no one, simply no one, for mi to vent my anger, my frustrations. i mean who will realli be there for u when u're not even blood-related. they'll leave u one day. juz like our loved ones. so if u were to leave one day, please let mi noe in advance. at least i'll have a day to accept it n it wouldnt be tat sudden.

i miss tat pink rose from u.

i've a dumb bf. blehs. hahas.

everyone's changin.

pretty white roses. best presented wif a box of chocs. the best i've ever got. =D aites, happy 5th month. =)) hopefully i wun get it from my dad ar. hahas.

frenster's down. frenster sux. =x hahas.

anyway, sch started. dun realli hav the study feelin yet. mayb coz too much tutorials n labs have been cancelled. but well, it's gd to be in sch. =)

hmm, let's see. today. kinda agitated. by who? a bitch. blahs. wtf is wrong with u? it's not as if we ARE SNATCHIN THE GUYS AWAY FROM U! we are simply not into the kind of guys u like. oso, stop going ga-ga over guys who juz have looks. n when they giv out the signal tat u're too over or they're not interested in u, simply stop wad u've been doing coz it's simply irritating if u continue on.

humans are weird. they go for appearance. so if u noe how to dress up nicely, ppl like u. juz like a peahen, which tries to attract peacocks wif their feather. so for guys, they look at pretty girls. if not, as long as the girl is thin, they think she's pretty. as for girls, they see the way guys dress. den their hair, den height, den face. if he's better lookin, they think he's handsome. wth is wrong wif them? blehs.

tok to jacky. he says pay is out today. i shall check tml. if it's still not there, (curse tat bitch.) i'll call n i swear i'll go down n find her if i dun get a reasonable ans.

nothing else for now. cant realli sort out my thoughts. havin a damn headache now. since noon. boo~

i'm gone. blehs.

once, they were so tiny.

so loving.

so cute.

boxers has a 'shield'.

look again.

voila.

wahahas. so cute rite my bunnies? they're so FAT!!! too fat for being less than two months old. here's their mom.

cute rite? hahas. did i mention mochi likes to shit on the bunnies? hahas. interestin hobby hor? wahahas. n we hav an amazingly clever bunny called flip(the white one). flip amazingly jump onto sis's bed to rest. hahas. so clever rite? LOL.

anyways, made cookie a few days back. hahas. quite successfully lah. but somehow the mixture was damn sweet. hahas. been walkin around these few days. my back's aching somehow. i dunno why.

went to watch april snow on 4th. not as nice as expected. maybe coz i couldnt concentrate since i'm DAMN SLEEPY. saw cheng ai hoon there. how 'lucky'. anyway, didnt bother to tok to her. dont act as if u're my mom. coz u simply aint. saw her in the ladies too, i simply turned. anyway went to tpy to get a cake for tat woman. i dun like u bitch. but i dun hav a choice but to deliver the cake to her. bleahs.

went to buy my shoes yest. bought a top. I.P. zone's better than s&k. hahas. bleahs. den walked to cine n played pool. ya, i'm not supposed to. but i did anyway. hahas. kena trashed by sly. haha. but i still win one game coz the white ball went in. muahaha.

walked around. den went to yishun. CUT my hair SHORT. now my hair is SUPER thin now. cant even tie properly. not the kind i expected. but well, my hair will grow, rite? hahas. so i dun care now. shall go cut again. soon. hahas.

feelin damn sleepy now coz didnt manage to sleep well. there's a continuous beepin sound(since yest till noe) in my room. n i've completely no idea where it's coming from. n there's some prob wif my phone i think. some weird noises came from it till i cant get to sleep n i simply had to pull out the line from it. boo~ freaky day.

now i juz need money to buy tat purple bag i wan n more money for the books. =))

today's dad bday. but we didnt realli have any idea wad to buy for him. so well, maybe a cake will do. hopefully he juz doesnt come home n sleep rite away. hahas.

i'm so scared of tml. i think i cant wake up. i dunno wad to bring. oh no! arghh..

heard from jm her neighbour passed away. blahs. life's short. enjoy while u can. u never noe wad's gonna happen a second later. so i was thinkin, am i nasty to tat woman? ahhh, i dunno. it juz sucks.

Ohh I wanna let you know
That I'll always love you baby

Sometime I think about
Everything that we've been through
And I pray that you would jus open your eyes
I love you I need you
So please don't throw our love away

Since the day you and I snuck away to be alone
I knew from that night something special went on
It must have been the first kiss
You told me that no one else in the world made you feel this
I felt the same way too but nothing stays the same
I'm sorry for the tears I'm sorry for the pain
You were the one that always made things right
I promise you this though you got a friend for life
Maybe one day we can try it again
And maybe things can be a little different
So lets jus kiss and say goodbye
Cuz I really cant stand the pain of seeing you cry

I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me
I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me

All that's mine is yours that's what I said
Treat you with love and respect in everyway
You wanted I gave you need me I was there
Now you treat like if I'm not here
I love you and I need you don't wanna let go
If you want somebody else please let me know
Can't take it no more I feel I'm dying inside
Is this the price I pay for handing you my life?
I know I'm not prefect but I truly cared
So when you wake up one morning and I'm not there
Jus remember I loved you it will never be the same
Gave you everything and you threw it all away

I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me
I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me

I gave you my good and my bad
My heart and my soul,
My trust my money my time,
What more can you ask from a man
Even when times are hard
I held out my arms and held you
Even excepted you though whatever weather
But now I feel it we're at the end of the rope
Whatever we had now I gotta let go
Nights like this I wish raindrops would fall
To cover my tears
Wishing I could replace all those wasted years
Of loving someone who couldn't love me back
And now again I gotta start from scratch
But I know I've given you my everything

I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me
I've given everything
I loved you endlessly
But when it comes to me
You don't even notice me

curse tat bastard who knock into mi when i gave way to him n even stare at mi as though it's my fault. damn u asshole. bleahs.

books notes will onli be ready when sch reopen. wow. how are we gonna study on the first day of sch? blahs.

i'm going out tomolo(hopefully). my beloved discman is coming back to me. woohoo~ =D

cunsheng said jacky asked wad klass i'm in for biz mandarin. how the hell did tat jacky find out i was taking biz mandarin when i've never mention it before. blah blah blahs. but i cant be bothered by him either. hahas.

anyway was going to say FLIP WENT INTO MY ROOM. n i was wonderin how the hell it went in when my door was closed the whole time. flip shocked mi by runnin across my room at bout 6plus in the mornin. n sis has been behavin weird nowadays lor. she left one rabbit runnin around in her room WITHOUT CLOSING HER DOOR(she insisted she closed the door) n LEAVING THE HOUSE. n she wanted mi to catch it. i was super shocked when i saw her door not close. had to search around for the bunny. lucky it was disciplined enough to not run out of the room if not i'll be in deep trouble. but i didnt manage to catch it since it ran inside my sis cupboard. n she insisted she switched on the fan when she didnt. okie, it's either mi or her. hahas.

life's fragile. one lose someone important to them ever second.

did i mention saw some taekwondo guy injured the other time at ttsh? it's freaky lor. it's so dangerous. i mean like, wad if u lose ur life coz of the activity? blahs.

.fragile perfection.

went to cwp wif sis. saw this guy who's kinda cute. tsk tsk. but honestly, i'm still worried bout his situation. he has been havin on-off HIGH fever for 3 consecutive days. frankly, i dunno wad to do. he went to the clinic at semb two days back(40plus bucks). took a blood test. he wasnt okie. was refered to ttsh. so went to ttsh yest(70bucks). he took a blood test again. it appears to b okie but he's still refered back to the clinic at semb tml for blood test again(maybe another40plus bucks) in case. so in short, even ttsh is of no use. so i was thinkin wad if even after all this time of see the doc, n going for tons of blood test, losing tons of blood n he's still not okie? on-off fever which can b as high as 39.3 degree n medication does not work? wad's wrong wif him. or wad's wrong wif the medication of s'pore nowadays? blehs.

i'm scared.

changed my blogskin coz i think the pic is cute. hahas. but maybe gonna change back or sth. keke. anyway, boo. i'm not in a good mood. reason? look under. hahs.

hate the timetable. it sucks completely. mon 8-6; tues 9-6 n whereby we have 5hours of damn tutorials straight, where 2 are biz modules(econs n statistics); wed 10-11, a damn 1hr lect; thurs 1-830; fri 11-2. it's so sucky lor. how can u concentrate for a fuckin 5hours of tut? damn. spoil my mood. bleahs. needa buy books lecture notes again. those freakin notes. arghh.

so many movies she wanna watch. juz like heaven(coming soon), chicken little(coming soon), april snow, all about love... think april snow is endin soon. bwahs.

he's sick. high fever. measured his temp yest. he beat my record. 39.2 or 39.3 ar. went to the doc. the one at the train station. i dun trust them. but bo bian. the one near my house is closed. boo. anyway he took a blood test in case. results should be out today but cant expect him to come down all the way to semb to take rite? shall see if i can take on his behalf. blahs.

christina, tat sucker. sucha bitch. if u hav such a bad attitude, go screw urself coz u dun deserve to be in tat line. how r u gonna be a leader lydat. furthermore, u're the one who kept givin mi false statment. i'm gonna lodge a complaint if i still dun get tat freakin pay. bleahs. anyway thanx to mr thomas for helpin mi call tat bitch. think he got scolded or sth. hahas. oops.

blah blah blahs. i'm so not in the mood thanx to tat bitch.

love my darlin. tsk tsk.

went out wif lao gong. ah neh overslept n his granny is going over to his house or sth so nv meet us. kiwi kick soccer. julian nv reply mi. duhs. took the train n this baby kept touchin my bag. n she tried to GRAB my PHONE. duhs. anyway went to orchard coz lao gong wanna get back her phone. den walked around. so many places on sale seh. saw one fila shoes. nice. but somehow the bigger size de shoes looks weird. hahas. walked, walked, walked. saw this skirt. i think quite nice. so tempted to buy. but, my fuckin pay is not out yet. blehs. (anyway mr thomas's gonna fake my bro n call them if i still dun get my pay. HAHA. n i'm gonna be his external agent. hahas. i'm gonna help him. =D ) den went to bugis. went to bugis street. saw melvin. n hahs, he tot i forgotten him. wth. anyway, went to converse, lao gong bought her shoes. walk around. got sth in mind to buy for him. muahahas. went to the edge n saw this gal wif bout FIVE or SIX guys. we tot 2 of them wanted to, like, sound her stead. interestin scene. hahas. had dinner at yoshinoya. left a note to them. 'service not up to standard. food not up to standard. vegetable not cut properly. vegetable in chunks...' forgot wad else i wrote. but yea, tat's about it. i think the ppl there are tryin to kill my lao gong by givin her OVERWHELMING TERIYAKI SAUCE. so i tot, mayb the sauce will be expiring in a couple of days tat's y they gave so much. the veggy was soggy. ewww. den we went to had ICE CREAM. yummy! i had the ferrero n lemon one. sab had the tiramisu n mango one. all damn yummy. but the tiramisu one tasted very creamy. hahas. den walked around again. we were BORED. hahas. went around. we even went to seiyu. one sale guy was like tryin to promote a perfume which smell like honey. the first paper drop. my jaw drop too. i mean we were shocked. tot wad he was tryin to do. hahas. den he gave a second one. mayb we think too much liao. hahas. walk around n tested every n anything possible to test. hahas. sat at mos n had milk tea. den went to poa n bought belt. they should be honoured we were their last customer. but we felt damn cheated. there's onli one buckle for 5 belts. WOW. nice one eh? hahas. have to source around for buckles. duhs. took the train. saw a damn obscene scene. i shall phrase it nicely. a lady, wearin sleeveless, did not SHAVE n she was holdin the pole juz beside me. i saw when i turned. gross lor. (..") n her fren, maybe she thinks i'm damn slim, but the truth is i'm not, was holdin the pole too. n she keeps movin towards me. damn gross. blah blah blahs.

today's a bad day. queue for the atm n got cut-queue by some GENTLEMEN. kept being knocked into like nobody's business n great one is tat there's a beetle now in my sis room flyin around. i swear i'll fuckin slam n crush it if it dares to come near me. i'm so prepared to do it. hahas. shall get going.

took some neoprint. edited two. quite blur lah coz i dun hav a scanner. hahs.

i love you.




yet i did the worst thing i could ever do.




i hate it.

人生中往往有许多的遗憾。往往想要时间倒流，但是我们都知道那是不可能的。越想达到，做到的事，更往往办不到。不如就忘了所有，这样过一生。



find fault wif him as usual. seriously, i think he deserves someone better. blah blah blahs. i'm not in the mood to blog.



heard this song. 'lonely' by akon. reminds mi of the time i had wif wh n gang. anyway saw ray yest, with his forever grin.



i'm sad. sad utterly. i dunno wad to do. i'm depressed. i wan all these to end. i wish.



not the answer i wanted.




an official heartbreak.




i hate apologies. so stop apologising to mi. u did nothing wrong. everything lies on mi.

met sab a few days back.
have been thinkin.
nothing last forever rite?
yea, maybe tat's so.

' 生命里最可怕的不是死亡，而是绝望。' quoted this from a show. hahs, kinda true ba.

i'd love to hate you but i'd hate to love you. bwahs.

sent my discman for servicin. hope it comes out alrite. their service was pretty good. the service man(wadeva u call him) even called to ask mi wad's the exact prob. sony rox! hahas.

she fucking hates you.

i wan chocolates!!!!!!

hmm, let's date back 3days ago. had this dream whereby i simply bashed up tat basket in a restaurant or sth. he couldnt fight back coz i was a girl(maybe, i forgot) n simply coz i juz punch him in his tummy n when he gets up, i juz slap him. hahas. the feelin was... shiok. =x muahahas. coz he simply dun deserve any sympathy. blehs. u MADE mi HATE U. so wad was i supposed to do? hate u OF COZ. hahs. n congrats u're the first one who i hated so damn much.

2 days back. had another dream. a fun one. whereby i'm a witch n being able to cast spells. a good one i mean. n it's realli cool. where u can change something u detest into something lovable. it's fun being a witch. =D

yest. had another other dream. a more realistic one i guess. where mom n i were preparing to go out or sth. with those bickerings as always. with her helpin mi choose my clothes n me choose for her. den we'll fight for the toilet, make up, perfumes n stuff. it's nice tat i have this dream. least i was happy. she was happy. we were both happy.

having these weird, fun dreams recently. it's good yet bad. coz it proves tat i'm not sleepin well. i'm not restin properly. blehs.

observed the sky. watched fang tai cook last nite. hmm, wrong wrong. is durin dawn. wadeva it is called. n suddenly i feel like having curry chicken. so well, tat's my plan tomolo. cook curry chicken~ yay! hopefully it turns out rite. n mayb send tat pig to work coz i'm simply too bored at home. hahas. i wanna celebrate hari raya like last yr!! but den again, i'm juz a intruder. intruder to their family. blahs. but i like their pineapple tart. it taste nicer. much more different den cny ones. it's the first time i like pineapple tart. =)) i wanna learn malay. i wanna be malay. malays. they are alot more fun. especially durin their festive season. u fast, den break fast. n least they make those tidbits, snacks themselves. not like cny. u BUY them. =P it's more sincere when u make them urself. u feel the satisfaction. especially when others like it. =)

yest went out wif waney. hahas. fun. went to semb cc coz sly was unable to accompany mi there. so well, LOST our way. hahas. aites, it's juz tat we missed our stop. hahas. like some goondo seh. den we ended up in semb park. hahas. ask the bus driver n realised we missed it 2stops before. lolx. so well, we waitin for the next bus like two idiots. the bus started n he told us the semb cc stop coz the first bus driver told him we wanted to go there. hahas. den reach semb cc. submitted my stuffs n mama say she want to take up chi classes. wow. hahas. anyway den we took the bus bus again to semb station n saw the first bus driver. paiseh sia. anyway he tok to mi abit in chi. wad a frenly bus driver. hard to find now. hahas.

went to cck coz we simply dunno where to go. somemore she's fastin. so well, didnt wan to go too far. n lot 1 simply sucks. it's like so so so small lor. den went to a shop which resembles s&k. n i mistook it as s&k. but yea, the clothes there are quite nice. lot more colourful than s&k.

took the train n alighted at woodlands. stroll around. saw a bookshop n we went it. bought four BOOKS. ya, we bought FOUR!! hahas. it's funny how we decided on the book. den walked around. went to guardian. wanted to dye my hair. but as usual, i'm still damn broke. i need my tat pathetic little pay. saw ah bu. she dyed her fringe tat area purple. i like tat purple lah. haha. but yea, show mama her. she said sth bout her. well, shant enclose her comments. hahas. but yea, some ppl are blinded. =P

den went off to mama's home. haha. sat in her room for awhile. she chatted on the phone for awhile while i slack. haas. after her chat, we were like off to make kueh. it's malay KUEH. those cookie kind. hahas. fun ar. but damn tiring. started at bout 3 plus 4. n finished it at bout 7plus lydat. god. hahas. until they break fast. hahas. i oso like fastin seh. whole day never really eat. but onli i broke fast by samplin 3 tiny lil' cookie ma ask mi to try. hahas. but least there's food after tat cookie makin. tsk tsk. nice food. =D

after eatin, chatted inside her room. hahas. nice. but now her room not as cozy as before coz her room is white now. i wanna paint my paint soon. hopefully lah. hahas. saw her baju. very nice. but i still prefer last year's one. =)

went off at bout ten plus 11 lydat coz they were going mustafa. hahas. ppl hari raya go geylang they go mustafa. haha. cute.

slept at bout 3plus 4plus lydat. was examining the continous lightning outside. it's freaky but realli cool. coz there's no thunder. there's onli a crackin sound for a couple times of the stronger lightnin. maybe the lightnin is too far away. i wonder where. anyway, the sky is like being lit up by both powerful n dim lightings. den u can see the lightnin strikin out. some went horizontally. i'm amazed. truly amazed. the view is spectacular. it's realli amazin how the world works. wanted to film it down but my phone is simply too lousy n worst is u cant predict the interval the next lightnin will come. blehs.

it's funny how our (guys n girls) thinkin differs when we are under the same category of, humans.

forgot to blog the other day. watch this documentary on stars n the galaxy out there. when the planets n stars explode one day, it will turn into a black hole. n one day the black hole will explode too. n when all the black holes, even the largest one explode, the whole galaxy out there will become a dark world. so wad is after life? death. wad is after death? life. researches show tat mayb there'll be more new 'creations' after the dark world. but till now, we'll aint advanced enough to know tat. n suddenly, i feel like livin forever. n see how the world change. till the sun's gonna explode. when it expands to such an extend and dry up everything on earth. n those planets nearer to the sun will b engulfed by it. n den it explodes. wow. it's a quite magnificent view if u can see tat. but well, u wun be living if tat realli happens. tat's when u say life's too short to accomplish tasks u've set to achieve. den suddenly, everything seems too wide, too much to be understood. everything turns meaningless. u wanna run away. run away from everything. tat's when u say i cant take it, n have the urge tat i wan everything to end right now. it's juz so contradicting.

he broke up wif his gf. but wad can i say? nothing. try to console him? nah. i dun n cant console anyone. so it's crap to say go console him. u can try consolin him if u wan. when everything seems such a lie. when u have to say 'there're better girls out there. there's bound to be someone for u'. n u think back, is it realli true? when a relationship ends with someone u love dearly, can u really get over it? if yes, maybe u dun love the person as dearly as u tot. n wad's wif the 5201314. who the hell would believe in tat? maybe some ah lians deeply in love wif their 'lao gongs'. eww. gross. i can onli say u're simply too ACT CUTE. when u try to make things seems as though it's realli true but the fact aint.

it's crap when u say i cant quit. n then say u have to quit if u dun produce any sales. hahas. well, my mind has already made up since day one. n everything seems such a scam. it's realli like ve. never wanted to enter a job lydat again. but well, he introduced mi to tat job. so wad can i say? i'm dumb. hahs. n finally i noe christina's ur fren. no wonder she treat u so well. well, wad can i say? nuthing. shall find another job next week. after everything's off my mind.

saw this realli cute lil' girl. look so blur, but always smiling. took a snap of her. tsk tsk. suddenly tot of my childhood. when everything seems so perfect. but now tat u're older, u can think better. so u see more flaws. flaws of the society, ppl, simply everything. like when u're having exams when u're young, no one is tat competitive yet. so u help one another. but when u're older n having exams, ur mindset change. 'i cant help them, if not their results will be better den mine. i muz get better results than them'. hah. wad's wif this fuckin mindset? when u give up on others leavin them to die, helpin onli urself. when u score better n wanna compare grades wif someone who aint tat good. hmm, wad can i say? u're simply a sucker. to be exact, a loser. coz u dun wanna lose. u wan the best results u can. tat makes u lose out all other wonderful stuffs. n den if one day the world crash on u, for example the person u didnt help score better than u or when u fail, u'll think how could this happen to mi? n den u become damn sceptical bout everything. u think everything's unfair. u wan everything to end now so ppl remember u're tat ace student n not a failure. when u cant take tat pressure tat's amounted so high up, u take the first step of committin suicide. when u think no one's there to help. u think the world has given up on u. when u sink into self pitiness, u're pathetic. appreciate wad u've gt. blahs.

i'm tryin to rearrange my thoughts. when u're alone, den will u think bout everything tat's happenin. when u're startin to appreciate stuffs, they start disappearin. well, i shall go mia for these few days till later to rearrange my thoughts. go catch up on my sleep. send my application form, buy some fishes, see a psychiatrist/counsellor/psychologist(nah, i'm juz kiddin), see a doc, blah blah blahs. hahs.

argh. bad day. i'm supposed to follow up on this cust n hell, i did NOT COPY DOWN HIS NUM!! damn. i'm so dead. but well, i'll get my money n leave first. hahs. =P

wanted to take a nap. but yea, muz be the throat. cant breathe properly. shall catch a doc soon. i hopefully dun wanna be diagnose of any terminal illness. hahs.

difference between a guy n gal as a couple. ' guy does things to make himself happy. gal does things to make the guy happy. n ultimately by makin the guy happy, she, herself, feels happy.' saw this on a show which i sorta agree. n darn, i forgot wad show. my memory is gettin from bad to worst. hahas. time for food. ciaos.

evenwithyouwithme,istillfeellonely.

oh my. i'm so obsessed wif the song on my blog. it's so damn damn damn nice. 请你跟我走吧。tsk tsk. =P

i'm so unsaved now. if i dun close this pendin sale, i might as well die. hahs. nah, i'd be happy to take all my money on a shoppin spree. niahahas. oso, had enough of waiting. waitin for the person to pick up. listenin to the forever-ringing-tone. duhhs..

my throat hurts so damn much now. it's even painful to drink. boo~ think i'm gonna fall sick soon. hahas.

yest:
saw poh eng. hahas. n after work, went to find him. on the train, one incident happened. i didnt see it but i heard it. the screams of a lady. there's a slight commotion on the train. cs saw the whole thing n he told mi. one young lady so kan jiong go chiong into the train. when the door close, the door kiap dao her hand. tat's when the screamin came. it's freaky. it's like dun rush n try to squeeze into the train when the door is going to close n when the train is almost full. dun u understand the concept of waiting? hell to u. y cant u juz wait? is waiting so difficult in one's life? though we spend most of our time waitin. waitin for fren, transport, results n wad so eva. blahs. n lucky the door opened n freed her. like wad cs say, lucky is the hand. not the leg. if not if anything bad happens is smrt supposed to support her from then on? hah. so whose blame will it be? the driver or the lady? n who's there to judge who's right who's wrong?

met piggy. though he says he's alrite, but i still think he's sick. he feels cold. bwahs.

it's rainin damn heavily now. boo~ shall be contented there's no work today. hahas. shall go disturb him now. hehes.

潘玮柏 - 爱很容易

我看不见你
熟悉街道里
经过的人不会有
行人的交集
手已握不紧
少了你的空气
把我隔在时间的玻璃

没关系
我还愿意
再继续努力
就算只是一场独角戏
全心全意
我撑得过去
不要走 OH
不要走

爱很容易 跌入陷阱
放弃我自己
就算是骗局 还有勇气
TELL ME BABY
让我继续爱你

爱很容易
相信命运
找不到自己
快乐的 伤心的脚印
都在说 MISS ME BABY
风一吹就散去

HEY BABY 要我怎么过
HEY BABY 要我怎么活
听着我的心跳绝对不会错
看着我的眼睛 请你相信我

I KNOW YOU KNOW I FEEL YOU
I KNOW YOU KNOW YOU FEEL ME
我愿意继续努力
全心全意 不会放弃

HEY BABY WHAT YOU CALL THIS NOW
WHAT DO YOU CALL
THIS WHAT WHAT WHAT
LOVE RIDE OR DIE
WHAT YOU GONNA DO GIRL
YOU BE FEELIN MY FLOW STILL
YOU BE WANTING TO GO UHH
IF I SAY THAT I CAN FEEL YOU
IF I SAY THAT YOU CAN FEEL ME

我愿意继续努力
全心全意 全心全意
不会放弃

work sucks. niahahas. place i was sitting was damn squeezy. duhh. i'm not tat slim lor. hahas. manage to noe one guy beside mi. nicholas. well, not realli noe ar. is he tok to mi. wow. n he's a pro ya noe. double wow. hahas. he could juz call someone up n start chattin wif them. omg. damn. hahas. i'm havin a sore throat now. boo~

anyway, went back semb. met kang wei. seg student. hahas. waited for him for 1/2 an hour. had mac for dinner. tok a bit den went home le. didnt tok much but least there's someone to send mi home in the middle of the nite. especially when there's a wake under my block. hahas.

my darling piggy was jealous. tsk tsk. =P i noe he's juz being worried for mi lah. =) but aites, i noe wad to do one lah. furthermore i onli had one burger. no others. hahas. love ya. =D

it's gonna rain. boo~

stupid angelfire. wasnt able to upload the song i wanted. but ya, i found a substituition. =))

Blink 182 - I Miss You

(I miss you, I miss you)
Hello there, the angel from my nightmare
The shadow in the background of the morgue
The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley
We can live like Jack and Sally if we want
Where you can always find me
We'll have Halloween on Christmas
And in the night we'll wish this never ends
We'll wish this never ends

(I miss you, I miss you)
(I miss you, I miss you)

Where are you and I'm so sorry
I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight
I need somebody and always
This sick strange darkness
Comes creeping on so haunting every time
And as I stared I counted
Webs from all the spiders
Catching things and eating their insides
Like indecision to call you
and hear your voice of treason
Will you come home and stop this pain tonight
Stop this pain tonight

Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)
Don't waste your time on me you're already
The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)
[x3]

(I miss you, I miss you) [x4]

3 A,3B+,1 C+. wow. gpa 3.5 lydat. my god. aiya, y wan compare wif my results? go compare wif someone better lah. duhh. blahs. y do u ppl like comparin results wif mi when mine suck? blehs.

read sam's blog. interestin. her views, are which i really agree on. the mask, which everyone's havin on. when are they realli gonna take it off? nah, maybe everyone will hav theirs on forever. ever since they're born.

n also, true enough, who would wanna hear those sad stories of one's life? ppl who onli like listenin to funny/lame/dumb things others had done. but den again, to be exact, something which appears to be funny/lame/dumb to u doesnt necessary appear the same to others. no two person is exactly the same in this world.

think bout how the person realli is feelin deep down inside when doing those stuffs. when doing things tryin to make others happy or tryin to cheer someone up.

saw this gal yest. who reminds mi exactly of hew. her style, acts, way of speech. blahs.

blah blah blahs. i'm so fed up. so confused. so pissed. so lost. so wanna cry. arghh. i dunno wad i'm feeling. i dunno how to feel. boo~ dun feel like going to work.

i'm like standin in the middle of the road, waiting for......

when will i see a rainbow again? the round rainbow, the onli rainbow tat i remembered. wif the sun n moon exactly infront of one another.

i cant let go. there's so much i wanna tell u. but i simply cant say it out. i'm so tied back to the past. ahh, it sucks.

engulfed in my own thoughts. i'm like followin a storyline. stuck in the story. the forever-similar plots. the forever-similar story. the forever-similar endings. breathin seems so difficult now. blahs.

ahh. now is onli the time i'm supposed to wake up. but i woke up earlier coz it's simply too warm n noisy. received an sms from ah lian tellin mi to check my results at 4plus i think. received my results via sms at bout 7. hahas. lucky i didnt fail any though i didnt do well. *phew. hahas.


aites, let's see wad we did yest. went to sch. met my piggy there. dumb piggy. hahas. he walked SUPERB SLOWLY. bleahs. he cut his hair. went to bugis. walked a damn long dist to have my SAN RUI TANG(turtle soup). yummy. took 857 to suntec. n with such coincidence. saw leon. wah. how coincidence. he was headin for suntec too. tok to mi abit n piggy when i was calling christina. hahas.


reached suntec. alighted. walked around. went thru timezone. hahas. saw sam n his downline. SUAY. den we went to see if there's any NICE movies. n with that, it's proven tat the service tat starhub provide is better den m1. hahas. walked thru millenia walk. think his mom spotted him. hahas. anyway, went to marina to catch the myth. went inside to 'people say' first. hahas. the waffle. super yummy. think it taste better den the one at gelare. had white choc blended i think. quite nice too. service there is alot better n have real good ambience. hehes.


caught the show. quite a dumb show. duhs. hahas. not as nice as expected. ahahs. show ended at bout 9plus. missed my sizzler. olio olio. niahahaks. had olio instead. service was quite good. had a chef's special n catch of the day. not bad. had strawberry smoothie. eh, the drink aint tat nice. super bubbly. hahas. =))


went off. super tired. hahas. as usual, he slept. super pig. hahas. =P


ahhH! damn tired. gonna work later. damn. going recap alone. hahas. cs had 36calls, one sales pendin. my oh my. i'm gonna die. haas. still cant find a noon job. bOO~

watched my date with a vampire. suddenly tot of this. only in times of crisis will you know who's ur true fren. n only den will u realise how much disbelief/trust they have in you. in times of crisis, there's no trust. however, thinkin of ways of survival is. even if it's killin ur best fren, family, betrayal n all. who's willing to sacrifice? i bet no one. man are born to be selfish. their instinct, their thoughts. kill to be the best. sacrifice anyone as long as u're the onli one who can survive. blahs.


who is willing to wait?


tot alot. nah, it's tat i've alot of tots in my mind. shant comment much. hahas. i needa get a afternoon job. hahas.


i've seen so much celebrity recently. wow.


i've a dumb bf. bleahs. =P hahas.

out wif xf. niahahas. swim, speak, slack, ate, slacking, gone. hahas. tok sooooooo much. blahs. chatterbox. hahas. she told mi so much bout MAPLE! god. maple's cool but well, i dun play them. so u noe i'm damn blur. lol. but seems interestin eh. hahas. found out tat northpoint's 3rd floor is damn COOL!!! wow, didnt expect it to become lydat. so nice the toilet. now den i noe they renovated the toilet. hahas. first time to see such a high tech toilet in northpoint. lol. flip jump into the bowl. super cute! hahahahs. =D

we are too used to ppl making decisions for us that we become indecisive.

woohoo~
gt a starhub job.
trainin tml.
niahahas.
i wan $$$.
i'll have $$$.
tsk tsk. =D
those interested can contact mi.
hahas.
10th coming.
sizzler.
muahahas.

niahahas. neoprints. pooh bear. food~ =))

got another pooh bear~~!!! woohoo~ hahas. lucky today the person very nice. not those ap kind. if not my pooh will be gone again. hahas. cheerios!!!

went job huntin again. hopefully those bastards would do wad they say like 'i'll call u tml/i'll get back to you'.

cs seems to be troubled by his gal n all tat. blahs. cant do anything to help lydat. sadded.

i'm damn tired. shagged. wadeva it is. havin a bloody headache now. i need sleep. ahahs. ciaos.

roti boy for mi. wad a surprise. it's really a surprise. hahas. n it's really sweet of u though u is SHUN LU CAI MAI de. bleahs. =D hahas.

the bunnies are so..... soo sooo soooo hyper. one keeps jumping around. for wad? i dunno. mayb juz to practise jumpin. hahas. n after all those 'hard work', they sleep. after sleepin? FOOD~ ahhas. wad lazy bunnies i have. they should be slaughtered n roasted. muahahas. =x

settled my bill prob. happy happy. =))

yest, went out wif cs n piggy. went to town. ate mui fan at lucky plaza. den went to PS. saw bosheng. hahas. shocked seh. but least i SAW him. long time no see. hahas. went so many places. shant elaborate. i'm lazy. anyways, went to mos burger. n i ate SIX ICHIGO. muahahas. pig had 2 n cs had one. hahas.

den went to kfc. had the hot devil drumlets. yummy! den tok tok tok. hahas. miss those days at ve when we simply tok n dun work. hahas. n when basket soh interrupts n we have to be separated n after the whole thing, we juz tok behind his back. wahahas. miss those days. miss those times of survey. hahas. anyway tok alot. haha.

shall start findin my job again. hahas.

ilham seems weird. but well, cant do much either since he dun open up. blahs. hahas.

i wan chocs. *HINT HINT. please catch the hint. n after eight pls. no others for mi. hahas. n pls TAG!!! i noe u're readin. hahas.

sly sly sly, thanx for the pic. hahas. love it. very cute oso. like mi. =D hahahahs. after ur promos we go out k? u shall decide where to go. =D i'll be waiting for u. *blush. kekes. wahaha.

when simplicity becomes complexity.

blahs.

boo~
weird dream i had. wonder y nowadays i'm having these kind of weird, some wad bad dreams. it kinda suck though i get to see those i wan to.

dream: it's chi new year.(think it's a couple of years back + now: senario-> couple of years back; now-> some addition things.) whereby helpin my mom is the norm. cuttin veg, fish, meat, etc for the steamboat. where i get all the new year's fun which i dun get now. where the family is full, happy together. den suddenly mom say there's this tiny turtle which will come out from somewhere n we hav to sort of keep it alive coz it'll bring gd fortune. den suddenly mom n i saw it runnin out from some pots at the basin. there were two of them(i think). they gt those cartoon turtle look n have this golden coin tied to it's neck. so we chase after it hopin no one will squash it. we went chasing n one of them went under my bed. we tried to catch it out but cant. den came MOCHI! mochi went chasin after the turtle tryin to bite it. we were tryin very hard to prevent mochi from killin it. the scene was damn chaotic. ahh, dunno how to describe lah. den in the end i woke up. it's freaky to see cartoon turtles running around. boo.

it's depressin. where everything had to change.

i simply have no memories of the past. till dreams nitemares come n refresh my memory. hahs. life sucks but least i've till gt a few bunnies to roast, him n cs to tok to. nah, i mean complain, nag, punch, hit, bite, slap, kick or wadsoeva tat i can think to do to them. hahs.

when too much is suppressed deep down, things go out of hand.

those dreams are spoiling my sleep. mood startin to swing, swing n swing. i wan to get out of this house. if onli i hav a car, i'll crash it. hahas.

ups n downs in the sea of love. hahas. nice show. weichen is so sweet. hahas. who would be willing to wait for someone for like 6months? a think a couple of weeks will kill them already. hahas.

oh ya, forgot to say. oso saw this real nice sweater. ahh~ NICE. i wan $$$. hahahas.

-one wish-

TAY PING HUI, TAY PING HUI,

TAY PING HUI~~~!!!!
XU QI, XU QI, XU QI~~!!!!

GOSHHHH, she realli damn PRETTY!!!
TAY PING HUI damn shuai. *cair seh. hahas.

damn piggy. trick mi say is my fren. if he my fren den song ar. muahahhas. =D
damn piggy again for not knowing who's xu qi!!! hahahas.
i'm so happy today. =))
woohOoO~

all my bunnies pic gone. the pic taken wun b the same again. lucky nv take tay ping hui n xu qi pic seh. if not more dui. hahas. all my darling songs gone. the songs wun b there again. lao gong, please help send mi. =x LOL. all my high scores gone! arghhh..

yada yada yada, u've got many frens. for everyone u see seems to b someone u noe. big deal. bleahs. hahas.

went to ps. met piggggy. had andersen's ice cream. woo laa laa~ soOooo NICE!!! but not as nice as the italian ice cream at bugis. muahahas. he look so shag. hahas. of coz lah. drink more lah. slap u den u noe ar. hahas. anyway, walked to orchard. hahas. wanted to go for the interview n damn! received a call from cs say wad interview not today. a big BOO to tat!!! anyway cs, u OWE MI N PIGGY ONEEE~ wahahas.

walked around. went to heeren. saw so many things tat look like piggy. hahahks. den walked, walked, walked. went to wheellock to service my phone. n tat's when i saw the SHUAI GE MEI NU~ hahas. n xu qi went to the nokia care center too. she's gorgeous. PRETTY PRETTY~ n as i've mentioned, damn piggy has no idea who the hell she was. duhs....

went off after i left my BELOVED phone there with the AP gal. damn. *sobs. no phone for 2 days. double duhs.. den walked around again. went to lido. had milk tea which sux. boo~!! piggy ap for he was not served. hahas. too bad they dun like u. =P hehes.

went to taka. ate yoshinoya there. had a ap server too. duhs duhs duhs... hahas. chicken delight was some sort nice. hahas. den walk again. went to the bazaar outside taka. saw a pretty bracelet. or anklet. wadeva it is. hahas. den was lookin at sony ericsson's phone when this guy wanted to serve us. den pig ask a stupid qn. 'all this ericsson's phone ar?' den obvious the ans was 'ya'. hahas. den we went off. n pig started again wif think tat guy was from his sch. wth. hahas.

went home after tat since it looked as if it was going to rain BIG. took all the way from orchard to marina bay, den back to semb. it was a dumb choice it was. but yea, lest i got to sit. hahas. n piggy slept all the way. blahs.

reached home. pig left for work. slept. n tat's when i gt a damn nightmare. shant tok about it coz i dun plan to keep it in my memory. hahas.

time for food~ =D

the bunnies gave out a weird sound. (..") hahas. anyway saw this realli nice necklace. in dilemma. boo~

starhub job -> those interested tml 2 to 4pm, scotts road, shaw ctr, bring along passport size photo.

ppl nowadays, so obsessed wif maple. boo~

damn. my damn phone cant mms. dunno wth is the prob seh. so much prob de. double boo!

i'm so craving for ice-cream. n chocolates... n i'm gonna hopefully get tat starhub job.

read thru some pass entries. blah blah blahs. i'm bored.

不得不愛
作詞：林夕/Rap:潘瑋柏　作曲：黃晞睿　編曲：Free Style　女聲：弦子


(女)天天都需要你愛　我的心思由你猜
　 　I LOVE YOU　我就是要你讓我每天都精彩
　　 天天把它掛嘴邊　到底什麼是真愛
　　 I LOVE YOU　到底有幾分　說得比想像更快

(男)是我們感情豐富太慷慨　還是有上天安排
　　 是我們本來就是那一派　還是捨不得太乖
　　 是那一次約定了沒有來　讓我哭得像小孩
　　 是我們急著証明我存在　還是不愛會發呆 BABY

(合)不得不愛　否則快樂從何而來
　　 不得不愛　否則悲傷從何而來
　　 不得不愛　否則我就失去未來
　　 好像身不由己　不能自己很失敗　可是每天都過得精彩

(Rap)I ask girlfriend how you been
　　　 來去了幾回　我從來沒有想過　愛情會變得如此無奈　是命運嗎
　　　 難道難過是上天的安排　沒辦法　天天的每天的心思到底由誰來陪
　　　 我誠心　我誠意　但周圍擾人的環境始終　讓我們無法在這裡自由相戀
　　　 我精采　你發呆　兩顆心不安的搖擺　
應該有的未來　是否真的那麼的無法期待　捨不得在傷害

　　 You're girl my girl my friend
　　 How much I love you so so much baby
　　 看著你哀愁　要我如何怎麼承受面對
　　 I'm sorry you're my sweetheart
　　 My love My one & only baby

(男)會不會有一點無奈

(女)會不會有一點太快

(合)可是你給我的愛
　　 讓我養成了依賴
　　 心中充滿愛的節拍

pissed.

some probs with blogger. arghh.

aites, yest piggy came over to my house. he disturb mi as usual. blahs. den went to eat at sunplaza. saw sis. anyway, we ate curry chicken with rice & bread, n prawn noodles. yummy~ den walked around. wanted desserts but nothing tat realli tempted mi coz i need water!! hahas. den went to abc n bought water chestnut drink n chocs(milo nuggets if i'm not wrong..) hahas. so nice. love chocs~ den went to NTUC. walk walk walk, den decided to stock up my house. wahahas. bought veggy, campbell, egg tofu, n i forgot wad. hahas. i've bad memory. den went to my void deck. n AS USUAL, he played my hp game. wantin to break my record. hahas. lousy~ =P den i went home first to put those stuff down while he waited at my void deck. went down after awhile. hahas. walked, walked, walked. saw this couple infront of us with KFC. DAMN! we keep walkin in the same direction. think they tot we're stalkin them. hello!? we're not tat free okie?? duhs. den pulled piggy to another path. went to 588. hehe. so nice. with the breeze.. woo~ i laid on the bench while he played the game again on the other bench. hahas. nice. but failed to break my record coz my hp low batt. wahahas. =D den stared talkin. hahas. aites, he tok most coz i was lyin down. lazy to tok ar. hahas. talk alot like how we met n blah blah blah. i juz wanna refresh my memory. hahas.

guess he's still sleepin now. so time to disturb him. muahahas.

quarrels = sucks
no money = double suck
no bunnies = triple suck
no job = suck x4
no frens = suck x5
no you = suck to the core

wahahas. i'm juz bored. bored to death. ben lai going find job wif lao gong de but she not feelin well.

DEN he called den start scoldin all sorts of things. he fought wif his mom. wth. till police came. they took down his name n threaten if he did tat again, he'll sued n soon be sent to jail for abusing. oso, sued for mistreatin his mom. den went to meet him. den he start scoldin mi all sorts of things again. duhs. den tried to cool him down n he slapped mi. den got one passer-by(pb) 1 saw. den pb1 bu shuang he slap mi. den pb1 go n give him a punch in his tummy. he fell. den he become not happy oso. den they start fightin. punchin here n there. den pb1 found some metal pole thingy from somewhere n wanted to throw at piggy. den while he was preparing to throw, he swing the metal pole backwards n it hit pb2. den pb2 bleed seh. den pb2 oso bui song. pb2 put the pole den pb1 fell. den they heck care piggy n started fightin. now piggy bu shuang den fight wif them coz they ignore him. den i stand one side watch show coz they all ignore mi. n SLY!!! i saw NAT HO. he forever so shuai. n he remembered mi. den i left the fightin scene n went off wif nat. tok to him. *blush* wahahas.


* wahahas. the story is twisted. VERY twisted. use ur imagination. hahas. juz for fun. =P

* for those who doesnt know who's nat ho, plz search it up.

erms, sly-ish sly-ly sly, any comments for my story of the day? muahahas. =D

the white lil' bunny. SO FAT like piggy. but not as FAT him. (erm, if u get wad i mean. =x hahas.) it's time for roasting resting. =)) SO CUTE unlike piggy. (erm, if u get wad i mean againnn. hahas.) n guess wad? it fell asleep on my palm!!! OMG!!! so DAMN CUTE~ gosh. =D

aites, dun say i treat u bad. u cute nah. but see the diff? =x muahahas. =D love ya. *shy. aites, things are gettin mushy. wahahaks. =P

job JOB job, where're u?!?! duhs...

oh ya, raymond(not piggy, OBVIOUS) ask if i wanna go clubbin. woo. wah. i'm still UNDERAGEd. hahas. ' aiya, nvm lah. can borrow fake id one.' DUHS!!! wad onli. i'm a good girl ya noe? lolx. i shall onli go there when i'm OVERAGEd wif my girlfriends. hahas.

=))

boring boring boring boring boring.
n i'm stuck at home.
sis's out wif thomas.
blahs.




there'snodifftoyouwithorwithoutme.
whenothersmeantmorethanme.
whenotherstuffismoreimportant.
whenimeantnothingtouatall.
maybeyou'llbehappierwithoutme.

slept at 4plus last nite. damn tired. was doing my own stuff when suddenly cunsheng msg mi. i was shocked. anyway he had a tiff wif his gf. so he wanted someone to console him. but yea, in the end i was lazy to reply so we ended up on the phone. tok alot seh. like last time. very lame lor him. as usual. (..") den tok, tok, tok, den side track. den side track, side track, side track, den link to other things. ahahas. he said he saw tat pig b4. n he thinks he's hip. wow. lol.

as usual, he said i've change. blah blah blahs. hahas. he is involved in the cyndi's concert thingy. so hope he can get some free tix for mi. =D he has a gf who looks like maia lee. double wow. but ya, he has a rich gf. he tok bout the wishes we made n all sorts of stuff. hahas. kinda miss my sweet memories in ve. n those abc tee downs on him. lolx. tok bout the basket. hahas. funny serve. serve tat basket right for losing all his invoices. karma. =P aites, i'm real nasty when it comes to him. hahas.

piggggy called twice while i was on the phone wif cs. hahas. guess he's kinda jealous tat i tok to another guy for so long. lolx. piggggy's not workin tomolo. so guess shall juz go n search for jobs with him since others like not steady when to go one. n i'm tired of slackin at home. i need cash!!! hahas.

my phone is givin mi probs. i mean it has some prob. dammit. it's juz 10days old n probs occur like 2 to 3 days after it's bought? my god. damn nokia! hahahas. but least the cam is good.

fat fat mochi.
fat fat little mochis. =D
they're realli damn fat. =))

the heart dropped. =(

blah blah blah.
i'm bored.
husdi husdw husda husdn husdn husda husdg husdo husdo husdu husdt
uoiwei uoiwel uoiweo uoiwev uoiwee uoiwey uoiweo uoiweu
jksdi jksdm jksdi jksds jksds jksdy jksdo jksdu

the baby bunnies had opened their eyes. they're so fat. good for roasting. tsk tsk. =D i'm juz kidding. muahaha. took their pics. sooooo FAT! but cute ar. sad tat ribs had died. but well, 3 have to carry on wif their lives. they're simply too fat to continue squeezin in the tiny box. they'll have to shift in a few days.

things to be done:
- get a job
- pia the job
- pack my room
- go out with frens
- go shopping
- kill n roast the bunnies =D
- upload bunnies' pics
- play with them if possible
- sleep =)

tat's my life for this month.

muahahahas. exams' over. holiday's here. n i'm so prepared for all the coming supp paper. hahas.

yest finish accounts very very quickly coz i realli didnt noe how to do. how great. hahas. anyway my pig waited for mi. can seen he depressed lah. tried to cheer him up but he still ap mi. bleahs. hahas. went to fish n co wif kiwi, ah neh, cs, ah lian n jian yuan. food was nice but not tat fillin as i tot. kop some food from lao gong n her xiao lao po. =x tsk tsk. saw one of the manager from ve. he smiled at mi. hahas. least he remembered mi. =)

walked around. fun but boring. coz we had no where to sit. hahas.

went to my piggggy house today. it was a LONG journey. boo~ but yea, had roti boy so i'm quite satisfied. n he as usual was bullyin his sis. wad a pig. hahas. aites, gtg. needa sleep. =)

time for a job. =D

wooo~
i'm so prepared for my sup paper.
marketin was like shit.
damn.
study n no study like the same seh.
boo~


today's gonna have accounts.
omg.
i'm gonna do badly.
feel so fucked up by exams.
so in short, exams sucks.
woohoo~

one baby died. one of the baby rabbit died. n as if it's my fault when i found it motionless when i came home. bloody hell. n i'm not gonna feed nor play wif it again in case i KILL another again. fuck.

went to changi yest. airport i mean. ate at popeye. quite nice ar. hahas. didnt study abit. coz simply gt no mood. hahas. so crap around, lame around. kept real quiet while eating if not lao gong wif suffer from cs evil hands. ahah. den after eating, went to see planes. wahaha. took some pics but yea, the colour looks abit off. hahas. walk around after tat. walk, walk n walk.

den went home after tat. on bus, cs n kiwi were betting if jm or mi will bus-sick first. hahas. lousy. =P

i seriously need sleep. zzzz

92392798 -> my new other num. please update. =D

cmaths was realli sucky. =P

i need sleep now. =))

~mochiMOCHImochiMOCHImochi~

MUAHahah.

eit was okie but as usual, i forgot alot of things. haha. hopefully i pass. =D

~mochiMOCHImochiMOCHImochi~

behind the smiles hid the frowns.

i dunno wad choice ilham has made.
i dunno wad choice i had made him make.
i dunno wad choice i've done.
i simply dunno.
blahs.

mochi has given birth to 4 lil' mochis. 4 additions to the family. =D but i think they're abit disgustin coz they're furless. eww. they're oso 'flip-floppin'. damn eww.

lost one heart. n hell i have completely no idea where it dropped. maybe it's destined tat i cant receive anything tat has any 'heart' on it. hah. bad start. maybe everything will end when the second one falls.

mr cunsheng once told mi there'll be two MAJOR DOWNS in my life. think one is done. the second one maybe coming.

blahs. maybe u should find someone who treats u better. someone who wun mistreat u. someone who will bring u good luck n fortune. maybe u're gettin tired of this. maybe i'll end up like sis. blahs.

blahs. eit's tml. n i have not finish studyin. wth. i'm so dead.

saw kimliang n goldwin yest. wow. they're colleagues. wow wow. such a coincidence.

i cant concentrate wif u around. u're my distraction.

hugged my pikachu to sleep last nite. i missed the person who bought it for mi. really miss tat person. missed those times we had together. missed those outings together. missed talking to u. my hippo. another toy bought for mi when i was in the hospital. blahs.

thoughts tat he will pop by my house n give mi a surprise. nahs. i'm juz dreamin. i dun deserve it. he deserves someone better.

these frequent headaches tat hit mi like nobody's business.

think wadeva u wan.

my pooh. notice the sign beside? ' I WAS WON AT TIMEZONE ' =D

this guy. such a nice guy. behind all his smiles n tricks, lies the sorrow, depressed, hurt soul. it's so sad. such a sad story. really. my, tat girl's such a bitch. sucha liar. he played an jing for her. her fav song. so sweet. but tat gal bastard him. cuts, suicide attempts. oh damn. he loved her so much to be hurt by her. n now he cant let go. it's hard to let go.


' You're like a crystal.
A fusion of beauty,outside and inside.
You possess a character that only an angel possesses.
You're special, because you are. '